Rounds 4-6

[AJ Burman]

...Will go here when I have them written.

[AJ Burman]

The long story short part of all of this is that I pretty much need one of Estelle, Liza, or Rory to win this HOH so that I'll have the biggest chance of being safe. If Suzette or Talla win it, I'm in a really bad way since they'll put me up for going after Suzette, and if Krystal or Dixie win it, I'll probably go up since that's what their masters will tell them to do. Even though I'm trying to cheer Liza up by saying we have Rory, and Rory says he has Ryan and could get him to put up the people from Suzette's group were Ryan to win, in the long run it could be seen as potentially good for Ryan and Rory if neither of them won HOH. The house is pretty much at a point where on one side there's Suzette/Talla/Krystal/Dixie, and on the other side there's myself/Liza/Estelle/Andrew, and then there's Ryan/Rory in the middle. Suzette's group wouldn't necessarily put them up over us because there's at least a chance that one of them might work with her in the future if something happened. And conversely, I wouldn't put them up because taking out another guy when I'm trying to fight off and take down a group of misandrist bitches (half of who are probably guys themselves, which makes it all the more disgusting as there's probably some gender-traitors in there), just wouldn't be smart. 

I'm kind of glad Liza and Estelle are on my side though. Like, they 'get it', and understand that it's much more in your favour and much smarter to base your alliances off of who you get along with and who compliments you best strategically instead of what's between your legs. It's stuff like that and how Andrew and I understand it that gives us an edge over that narrow minded shit. We could have easily gone and formed an all-guys alliance at the start, but we're not like that. So, even though all I can really do is sit back and watch this HOH pan out, I've gotta have a little bit of faith that at the end of the day, one of the right people wins HOH and we can cut the head off of this sexist snake Suzette calls an alliance.

[AJ Burman]

Man oh man, when Liza pulled out that HOH and agreed to put up Suzette and Talla up on the block, it was such a GOOD feeling that you would not believe it. It was seriously so nice to know that not only was I most likely safe, but that things could actually go as they were supposed to and that Suzette could actually wind up getting evicted before Jury even starts. That would be so absolutely amazing and would just be so freaking fitting. It totally made my past couple of days and I genuinely had a giant grin on my face from it.

Of course, after Liza wins HOH, Suzette comes up to me and is trying to start I guess getting information so she can stir stuff up being all "obviously your plan failed since I'm still here, so tell me why you nominated and targeted me" when it was something that she started and then when I decide not to be an enabler and let her try to get me to give up a bunch of info by taking a few minutes to let her calm down, she gets all "what did Liza not give you permission to talk to me?" like somehow she's my boss or leader or something. After I calmly explain to her that I didn't want to feed into her trying to stir things up, she freaked out, called me paranoid as fuck, and started coming at me, suggesting I had something with Alec, accusing me of being fake, and accusing Liza of 'being my master' that I only did what she told me to do, when putting up Suzette was one of the easiest choices I ever made. Then she goes and sarcastically starts being all "oh hopefully we don't put put up against each other, hopefully we're both safe and you put a good word in for me". All because I just said one thing she mistook, and then explained I'd be open to clearing the air if she wanted to. Like, I get that she was probably upset I didn't divulge much she could use against me, but there's hardly a need to get all confrontational when I was being civilized despite things. And besides, I'm obviously going to protect my allies by not putting them in danger when there's not a need for it.

There was some weird random thing with Andrew too where we got all confused about Estelle and I momentarily forgot how often she'd said she never talked to Greg, and Andrew started thinking Talla wasn't actually with Andrew and we kinda went back and forth on things before we came to the conclusion we were both stubborn as fuck and blunt sometimes and did a whole apology session. For all the bitching that I do about him sometimes, I do like that he never seems afraid to say what he feels...even if I do want to smack somebody over how the Veto picks turned out, and shake him when he said he thinks he did absolutely horrible on the Veto. I suppose once again we're forced to put all of our faith in Liza so that she'll come through and the noms can stay the same.

[AJ Burman]

So, Liza just won the Power of Veto over Suzette, Talla, or anybody else that's not Andrew.

[AJ Burman]

So Liza went and didn't listen to a single fucking thing I said and decided "hey, I'm going to Veto Talla and put Ryan up because it totally doesn't make sense for one of them to be guaranteed to go, and I'm not all of a sudden going to think that because of one thing she said before I won HOH that she's clearly not with Suzette". Now I don't know why Liza was so intent on being what I'd call just a wee bit ridiculous this round, but I have no intentions of letting a stupid risk turn into a worst case scenario like this. Suzette's already gone and led to 3 guys getting evicted, and I'm not about to go and risk a 4th, even if it IS Ryan. Andrew better not get any crazy damn ideas either, otherwise I'm going to be very tempted to cut him (and possibly Liza depending on if she pushes for Ryan to go) and just keep him enough in the loop vote-wise because if he and Ryan don't get over that stupid shit they have, then every one of us is going to suffer.

I just know when I wind up winning HOH, I know what I'm going to do, and I'm not going to be one for getting any crazy and stupid ideas. I'm just going to be sticking with what makes the most sense to get me further and with what has to be done.

[AJ Burman]

Whew, with Suzette gone I feel pretty relieved and I can go and focus on making the next round or two easy by just going after Talla and one of Dixie/Krystal (likely Krystal since now that I actually correct my typo on Dixie's AIM, I can talk to her). It just feels like a roadblock is gone and that now I've got a good shot at going really deep since I've got my alliance with Andrew/Estelle/Liza, as well as individual things with Estelle and Andrew that actually came about at the start and I'd be quite pleased to have as a potential Final 3, even though it's far too early to be thinking about that. I also seem to be in good with Rory, and I'm kind of acting as peacekeeper between Ryan and Andrew to try and get them to get over this stupid shit between them. I don't like being the type to go and start having multiple deals when I don't need to because it's kinda slimy to make a bunch when half of them you know you can't keep, but in a game like this it's a necessary evil at times to protect yourself and your alliance. 

And damn that vote being 5-2. With Andrew admitting he evicted Ryan, and it being 5-2, that means that 2 of Talla/Krystal/Dixie voted Suzette out, and if I had to guess, I'd guess it was Talla and Dixie who did. That being said, I don't really care at this point if Talla's was with Suzette and just evicted her to save herself down the line, if she wasn't with Suzette, or if she didn't even evict her. There's just something about her I don't trust, and it doesn't sit right with me. 


Also, it's about this point, I'm thinking I should do a Disclaimer post at some point since I'm half coming across like I personally hate everybody these days. 

[AJ Burman]

Well...that HOH was embarrassing and the results haven't even been announced yet. I knew that challenge was coming but I didn't think it'd be for another couple rounds now, so I wasn't paying attention and I didn't think to ask the people who did the competitions I didn't get to play in about them. So at this point, oops, and if I'm around next round, then I hope the next HOH plays out better.

[AJ Burman]

I swear, that Head of Household competition was the most hilarious thing ever. After Dixie took out Rory and I, Andrew wound up winning purely by default since literally everybody else eliminated themselves and it was seriously everything I could do to not just burst out laughing at it. Andrew being HOH is good in the sense that well, I most likely won't be going up or going home this week, but since it's like his 3rd HOH now it's a little bad for my image unless I wind up having some better luck with these comps, and I may wind up having to try for a Final 4 of myself, Andrew, Estelle, and possibly Krystal to have the best shot at winning. I may, as much as I don't like the idea, wind up having to cut Andrew at the very end if I think he will beat me. However, with that being said, I want to make sure my alliance is safe as much as possible and I want to make sure that none of them get evicted the next couple of rounds until I have to. After all, jury should be starting now.

When I caught Andrew today, I told him people were wanting floaters to go up, which is true since people had suggested Dixie and Krystal, but since I want to possibly see if Krystal can be carried along a bit, I'd obviously want Talla and Dixie up. Dixie since she did well in the challenge, and Talla for obvious reasons. They being said, I expect the nominations to be something like Ryan and Dixie, or Dixie and Krystal. If they're Ryan and Dixie that wind up on the block and I should happen to win the Power of Veto, then I could certainly have the potential to do something interesting by taking Ryan off, and kinda get Talla forced on the block, since if Andrew didn't put her up then, it'd possibly look like he was aligned with her. But...that may or may not be a crazy thing to do.

[AJ Burman]

So nominations are up, and my initial thought is:

 



But, I swear if Andrew doesn't give an actual truthful and good reason for it and if I wind up going home because his dumb fucking ass is pussy-whipped by fucking TALLA of all people who he should KNOW not to trust, them I'm going to change to a much less nice tune and show him my appreciation next time I see him.

[AJ Burman]

Andrew sent me this PM this morning, and I'm posting it here for reference for when I address it when I'm done my upcoming DR...as irritating and erroneous as it is.


"When we originally started working together, I wanted to go to the end with you as well. I know this probably seems like a lie but I really wasn't being fake to you. But then a bunch of things that happened after that point that made me feel like I was unable to trust you. I didn't write them in the speech because I didn't feel like it needed to be public knowledge, but I will address them privately with you. It was mainly 3 things.

1. You tried to get Liza/Estelle to change my co-HoH nominations after I tried to get them to keep yours the same. And this was after I explicitly told you that I absolutely under no circumstances wanted my nominations to change. I didn't understand this at the time, I still don't now. We were Co-HoHs that had to make decisions together, and even though I would have made different nominations than you I still respected your right to make your own decision. But you tried to go over my head and get Liza/Estelle to screw me over and that really made me reconsider my plans.

2. I don't understand why you were so dead set on convincing me of an alliance that didn't exist. Talla/Krystal/Dixie/Suzette were not together, but you tried to hammer it in my head that they were a tight alliance. I tried to explain to you multiple times that it wasn't real, but you wouldn't even entertain the possibility. In the end, Krystal and Dixie voted out Suzette so I hope you don't still think that alliance existed. It just seemed like a convenient excuse to get me to target those people over the person who was actually after me (Ryan). Which seems like an indirect way of eliminating an ally without getting blood on your hands.

3. It didn't seem to bother you that someone would vocally call me out on the board. I didn't expect you to defend me or anything, but you basically implied that I was stupid to try and refute Ryan's claims when he was slandering me. But how is it possibly better for me to give credibility to his claims (which I would be doing if I just ignored him)? The impression I received from you was that it was annoying that I would bother trying to defend myself because it made things more difficult for you to get two of your targets out during that round. I have never before had an ally that tried to guilt trip me for standing up for myself.

I feel like I did try and address these concerns with you but got shut down. I know you probably feel different about it. There are two sides to each story so I would like to hear what you have to say, but if you don't want to then don't feel obligated."

[AJ Burman]

(Warning: Potential Rant Ahead)


Ah, allies. Allies are great to have in a game like this, aren't they. A good ally will bounce ideas off of you, have your back, vote for you to stay when you're on the block, keep you off of it, and even Veto you off of it if the need be. Hell, a good ally will even nominate you for no good reason under a bunch of false pretenses and erroneous assumptions they could have asked you about, talked to you on and cleared up beforehand without even consulting the other mutual ally you both have.







I'm sorry, when did that come into place for being a good ally? Andrew pretty much fucking ditched me because he was pussy-whipped for Talla who's just feeding him and Liza shit so that they'll keep her around and now I'm forced to kiss the stupid bitch's ass to even have a decent shot of staying around now because all I could really count on in a vote for sure right now would be Liza and Esty. Seriously, even Liza was like "what the fuck?" with it and totally thought he'd lost it.

He comes up with some PM afterwards pretty much saying that he thought when I tried to get Esty and Liza to use the veto the round Greg and Brigitte left that I was trying to screw him over when the simple fact of the matter is that with the information we had as to how the voting would work, I was going to have it so WE would be ultimately in control of who went from the two sets of nominations and that everything would have worked out beautifully. But no, even though all of the Ryan stuff was trying to get it so Ryan wouldn't put us up if he won HOH, and so that Andrew would wake the fuck up and see the bigger picture as more than "Ryan must die", this is the kind of thanks I get.

When an ally goes so much out of the way and does so much to keep an ally out of harm's way from everything and everyone, including themselves, normally that's the kind of thing you get a "thanks man, I really appreciate it" for. That's not the kind of thing you...oh I don't know...PUT THEM ON THE FUCKING BLOCK LIKE THEY'RE YOUR TARGET AS A WAY OF REPAYING THEM FOR. He claimed that for some reason or in some way I was shutting own and not hearing anything he said, even though just about fucking EVERYTHING I proposed to him was taking his perspective and thoughts into consideration. I told him way back when we started that I was going to be blunt and honest with him on what I thought of things and that I couldn't just be a yes man to him because that would be being disrespectful towards both of us, and THIS shit happens when it should have been clear as day.

The worst part is that this Veto is pretty much luck based, and I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if Andrew/Talla/Rory all team up to try and make sure I'm the first one eliminated, with even Ryan joining in. I just have to hope that Andrew picks Liza for the POV to show that he's interested in salvaging things and that there can be some hope, but...I'm not holding my breath.

[AJ Burman]

That whole Veto mess was all sorts of crazy, and I don't know how the hell all of us but Talla decided "you know what, that bottom right corner looks AWESOME, let's go hang out there!". Just from the fact that myself, Esty, Rory, and Andrew were all like, sharing panels at one point made me pretty sure that Ryan was going to win, and after about 3 or 4 different tiebreakers because of Esty and Ryan sharing the same panel not just in the main round, but in the first tiebreaker as well, he did. Now, I'm not going to lie or pretend that I thought I actually had a legitimate chance at this or expected to win, but that doesn't mean when they got their first hit on me I didn't get pissed and go "fuck!" knowing my chance at Veto just went right out the damn door with it.

It's so damn frustrating, but Ryan winning might be some odd kind of silver lining, if you actually think about it. He and Andrew have been going at it for ages now, I've been Ryan's shoulder when he needs to talk it out about it, and Ryan would probably love nothing more than to fuck up Andrew's plan to get me out and have his week go to waste. Actually, scratch that, I mean Talla's plan to manipulate Andrew like a fucking puppet into personally evicting his closest ally so that not only does an HOH week that should've been spent getting her out go to waste, but he's down an ally, down a jury vote, and incapable of playing for the next HOH. Of course, this is unless Andrew went absolutely BATSHIT INSANE OVERNIGHT and just randomly decided "Oh, I'll put up and try to get out my closest ally for no reason whatsoever, when there's no proof to even suggest he's against me and when I could beat him in the Final 2 anyway", but let's be honest here...WHO EVEN DOES THAT?!

The worst part is that unless I get Veto'd I can't even really pitch anti-Talla stuff, which sucks since Andrew likes her and Liza for whatever reason seems to think she might be possibly "one of us", to which I've always been like "no, Talla is not one of us, never will be one of us, and never has had interest in being one of us" since she'll just see myself, Andrew, and Liza evicted back to back to back if she gets the chance to. I have to play up to Ryan about how if he wants me to stay, like he's kept telling me he does, then he has the power to ensure that it happens and force Andrew into a bad spot. He's gone from saying he "thinks the votes are there to keep you" to "I don't know where the votes stand" a couple of times, and stuff like that so it's not looking the most favourable right now, but I have to keep at it since Talla telling me that if Ryan Veto'd me it would really shake everything up, kinda says I'm the target. I don't trust her, I don't trust Andrew, and I don't really trust anybody on things that much other than that Liza's shocked and didn't want this to go down and that if Esty were HOH none of this would have happened. I think Ryan's a smart guy and that I can make him see the light and how this could help him, but like really...at the end of the day am I just supposed to blindly trust him that he'll use it and trust Andrew being shady and acting like he "doesn't know what he wants to happen, so he might just try to take it back"?

[AJ Burman]

(Shit this is also longer than planned. I must actually legit enjoy writing DRs for this if I keep going over all the time.)



This whole situation is stupid.

Just stupid.

That's really the best way to describe this entire thing. Ryan winning the Veto and taking off Rory is whatever, since I always suspected they had something (and even told Liza, so I have no idea why she acted surprised to me), so that's whatever, but Andrew putting Liza up instead of Dixie/Krystal, is even more stupid. It could have easily gone Liza, Talla (since Andrew and her would just agree on whatever anyway), and Estelle voting for me to stay, and it really wouldn't have mattered whether or not Ryan and Rory decided to go after me for some random reason or not.

One thing that does kinda worry me a little is the Aussie to Canadian ratio. Some Aussie alliance would work out for Ryan and Rory since Krystal and Dixie are kinda just there and to go the the final 4 with those 2 girls would do wonders for both of them. I might have to keep my eye on Esty a little just to make sure she doesn't get tempted to ditch me for them if I stay. Ryan, Rory, Talla, and Esty all guaranteed me their votes to stay, and Andrew said if it tied he would keep me, so hopefully I'm not going to find myself evicted tonight. Liza's meltdown probably helped my chances, and while I want to put up Andrew and Talla were I to stay right next to each other so they can't veto the other, I can't because I still have to be wary of the Aussies. I want to come across as keeping my word by "giving safety to anybody that would guarantee and give me their vote to stay" should I survive and win next HOH (at which point, I might just put up Dixie and Krystal to kill 2 birds with one stone, but I don't want to get ahead of myself).

I still want to just punch Andrew in the mouth and Talla should've been gone ages ago, I'm still pissed I didn't win HOH or POV, and I still don't trust Talla one bit. Even though Andrew will likely never trust me again, and I won't really trust him, the longer Talla stays and he has his head up her ass, the worse it is for me. I just can't do anything about it if I go and screw things up more by getting myself evicted.

[AJ Burman]

So I stayed unanimously, which is always good, even if losing an ally and even being on the block in the first place absolutely sucks balls. I'm thinking it might be best for me this round to try and make myself needed by both Andrew/Talla, and Ryan/Rory even though I doubt either would take me past 3, and I'm both skeptical and hopeful with the HOH at the same time. I say that because I'm entirely hit or miss on both puzzles and mazes, especially when I don't know what kind of puzzle it's going to be an can only guess that it's going to be a slider or a jigsaw puzzle. Either I do really well on them and just get through everything super quick, or a screw up and take freaking forever, there doesn't really seem to be some middle ground. Part of me's getting just a LITTLE bit frustrated that I haven't actually won an HOH yet (despite that co-HOH thing, I actually came 2nd then) or even a POV. Like...this isn't like me at all, and statistically at SOME POINT the pieces have to fall into place right and I have to win something. I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping it's this time.

[AJ Burman]

Well, that HOH was strangely back and forth. It was like 11 or 12 minutes for the puzzle and 30 seconds for the maze. Seriously, that damn puzzle took forever because the background was all the same and barring the outer pieces it was like damn near impossible to figure out where all the lines were and everything like that. Fortunately I saw the solution to the maze pretty much the moment it was put together in the puzzle, so I flew through that thing. Truthfully, I kinda really wish that the maze alone had been the HOH because that thing only took me as long as it took me to draw a trail straight through it and upload it. Who knows, maybe everybody else fucked up on the puzzle or couldn't figure out the maze at all, and failing that, I guess there's always the POV.