Rounds 4-6

[AJ Burman]

So....DIXIE of all people wins HOH?

[AJ Burman]

I'm pretty sure I've been here before. Let's see, back on the block with Rory next to me, HOH getting the Player's Pick Veto thing, and it being mostly Aussies playing in the POV comp....yeah, seems about right. Man...why couldn't Esty or I just win HOH and make this whole thing easier? I totally knew that puzzle was gonna be what killed it for me, but at least Dixie went and picked Esty to play in the POV, so since it seems Dixie doesn't know of the alliance Estelle and I have, it might work out well if Estelle wins Veto too. This Veto being entirely luck-based, that means I don't have to worry about anybody really running away with this and me coming out looking like I'm bad at competitions despite that far from being the case. I'm actually rather confident in my ability to quickly pull random numbers out of my ass, because hey, I have a tendency to be good at odd things like that.

Somehow Andrew and Talla are talking to me the past couple of days like last round never even happened. You know, like Andrew didn't totally put me up for no fucking reason, go after me, call me out on a bunch of shit I didn't even do, and then put up Liza instead of Dixie or Krystal post-Veto to make sure Liza or myself would be totally screwed. I mean, they can't POSSIBLY think I'd just forget about that and go back and trust Andrew again, do they? If they do, then they're pretty damn mistaken because if getting rid of them now wouldn't be bad for my game then you can bet your ass I'd be trying to get them out right now. Instead, I have to pretend to be okay with everything, that I'm not in the least bit mad or upset over what happened, and all of that stuff. I don't really ENJOY lying to them like that, but really they kind of brought it on themselves and since Estelle and I teamed up at the beginning and she hasn't as of yet done me wrong (even though I'm not going to be naive enough to trust anybody blindly in here), my loyalty on who I want in the Final 2 with me lies with Estelle instead of Andrew.

It's still weird though to think that I'm on the block for waiting for Dixie to show up on AIM, only for her to never do so. Oh well, all I know is that she's good at competitions and if I'm looking for somebody to try and work towards having in an ideal Final 3 situation should I survive this round...she probably won't be the one.

[AJ Burman]

Holy crap, Estelle actually won the Veto! That's awesome even despite me falling into what seems to be the norm of "just finishing in the Top 3 in comps" and I'm hopeful that I can convince her to take me off so that I can be certain I stay.

[AJ Burman]

So, the Veto didn't get used, which is actually less to my surprise than you'd probably expect to be the case. Esty and I were both worried about being immediately perceived as together, and while I hate the idea of staying on the block since I have a 50% chance of going home instead of a 0% one, it DOES potentially make sense in the long term. Though, obviously I get that from a game point of view, she could be doing this thinking that if I stay, awesome, but if I go, she can deny being that close to me under the "if we had a F2, I'd have Veto'd him" claim. I did flat out tell her though that I'm never going to be all "Oh yeah, let me be up on the block! I'll volunteer, me me me!", partly because that's fucking stupid and a ridiculously bad idea on every level.

I've been talking to people since post-Veto comp, on top of post-Veto ceremony and so far Esty, Krystal, and Andrew all said they would keep me, which is good, and if Krystal's telling the truth, gives me an idea of where Dixie's head is at. Estelle also brought up something about seeing a game and seeing Talla and Rory using the same AIM accounts and aligning with each other, which would show they might have a pre-game going. Of course, this also kinda brings up the "and did you work with them prior?", even though the convo came across as very much saying that she hadn't and was kind of against them. This got out to Ryan and he said he'd vote to keep me, which is good and is 4 votes. Then Talla came up to me.

She said she wante to keep me but needed to know if I'd nominate her if I won HOH next round. I told her that I need her, but I admittedly really just want her out ASAP. The thing is, I do actually need her for one more round, so were I to win the next HOH, I'd likely put up Dixie and Ryan as both are good competition players, and if I could get Dixie out, it would put Krystal potentially on her own and make it so she could be somebody I could take to the F3 to help Esty and myself make the Final 2. Once Final 6 comes around though, Talla can get out then and hopefully Ryan would follow her so I'd be in an ideal F4 (where Andrew would still think I'd take him). If I win HOH, and somebody that's not Talla were to take one of Dixie or Ryan off though, it'd be incredibly tempting to put Talla up, and since she seems the type to have F4/F3 afterburners, I do NOT want her to get close to that far. I just have to focus on surviving for now though.